Lizzie's Story
"My mum was an amazing person, so kind, caring, generous, fiercely independent and very adventurous. She had so much love to give and gave the best two-armed hugs. She had the most wonderful laugh, which we miss so much. Mum moved to Lymington in her 60’s. It was her safe haven and her little bit of heaven. She loved her long daily walks along the sea wall and had created such a happy life for herself down here.
Mum was 75 when she was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer in 2021. She was a very private person and didn’t tell many people. At first, we didn’t want to think the worst, but it was very aggressive and she was given just a year to live. My sister and I took on the role of Mum’s carers, from the moment she was diagnosed and started her treatment until the very end. We tag-teamed the days and nights every week, right up until the moment when her end-of-life care started when she was discharged from the hospital and sent home for the last time.
Oakhaven was there to scoop us up
Oakhaven was there to scoop us up, not only for Mum but for us too. They were real-life angels, supporting us with Mum’s care when we needed it most. The nurses at Oakhaven phoned and visited every day in those final days and prepared my sister and me as best they could. The nurses were so caring and respectful, talking so kindly to Mum even when we weren’t sure how much she could hear.
On her last night, Mum’s breathing really changed. Jackie, an Oakhaven nurse, came in the morning and we all sat downstairs and had a cup of tea. We knew she didn’t have long left. When she took her final breath we were all there with her, holding her hand. Jackie gave us a nod to let us know she had gone. She helped us to wash and dress Mum for the last time, putting on her favourite pyjamas, moisturiser, and perfume, just as Mum would have liked. It was surprisingly calm and very tranquil and a real privilege to have been able to help.
It is such a humbling experience to go through losing someone you love so much and it's wonderful knowing mum was given the best possible care at the end of her life. She got her wish of being in her own bed at home and her last days were peaceful and pain-free. Oakhaven staff are very, very special people.
Walking in memory of Mum
My sister and I joined The Hospice Walk 2023 to give something back to Oakhaven whilst doing something fun, knowing that Mum would have absolutely loved to have joined in too! My sister’s competitive side came out on the walk and she set a challenge of completing it in under 7 hours. Our motto was ‘It’s not a race but it is!’ and we were the first team walking 26 miles to cross the line. Mum would have been so proud! I will be walking and fundraising again this year with a group of friends but this time I will be going for a more leisurely 26-mile stroll!"
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